Read about the origins of this story.
The lovely art of Derek Thompson inspired the creation of the page. All images are his with the exception of brainchild and slitherman who are “borrowed” from the work of Miles Teves.
The charming island of Ornö lies in the Stockholm Archipelago. It is believed to be inhabited by small creatures known as Yuqs though no man has ever spotted one and returned to tell the tale. 
Little is known about Yuqs, but much is surmised based on survivors’ reports. They may be small, round, unhygienic, fishlike, disgustingly amorous exhibitionists … or maybe not! Attempts have been made to describe them based on photo-fit evidence, but reports are contradictory and unreliable. Almost all attempts to photograph them have been unsuccessful. The only known photograph to provide any glimpse was captured on a pin-hole camera and is reproduced opposite.
Yuqs are believed to be extremely dangerous to mankind and it is thought that, should they ever succeed in spreading out from Ornö, the safety of the entire planet is in jeopardy. As a result, Sweden, an ostensibly neutral nation, is in fact in a continuous state of war-alert. Nearby islands are designated restricted areas and contain massive military installations aimed at containing the Yuq population on Ornö. The greatest fear is that they will succeed in escaping when the Baltic freezes over in winter.
The waters around Ornö are notoriously dangerous, and it is said that the Yuqs are responsible for frequent shifts in the rocks on the seabed, making sailing in the area a hazardous occupation. Any encounter with a Yuq causes the victim, should he or she escape, to have an unnatural tendency to compose Limericks extolling the virtues of the Yuq. This little collection is aimed at those rash enough to be considering a visit to Ornö. You have been warned!!
THE LIMERICKS 
Yuq Rules OK
A creature from Ornö, a Yuq,
Who’d never consulted a book,
Invented a game,
But the rules were quite lame,
In fact, they were gobbledygook.
Amphibian
What an ingenious critter, the Yuq,
It never depends on a hook.
When climbing up hills,
It relies on its gills,
And trusts its ascension to luck.
Bio-degradable
On the beautiful island of Ornö,
A Yuq went out gaily one morn, Oh
Isn’t he lucky,
To be gathering yuqqie,
And turning it into power. No?
Roadkill
While out for a cycle, a Yuq,
With fatal distraction mistook,
For a green light, a red,
He went shooting ahead,
And was promptly mowed down by a truck!
Watch Your Step
A Yuq who was very unlucky,
Slipped one day in his yuqqie.
He fell on his head,
They thought he was dead,
But in fact he was just a bit mucky.
No Nudity
A Roman visiting Ornö,
When surprised by a Yuq screamed “Bongiorno,
Please put on some clothes,
And cover your toes,
I didn’t come here for the porno”.
Let Sleeping Yuqs Lie
What a mild-mannered fellow, the Yuq,
Its yap’s not as loud as its cluck.
Though it’s been known to bite,
If you give it a fright,
It hurts a lot less than a duck.
Dangerous
On Ornö, keep a weapon in your pack,
T’will be useful if you come under attack.
Though, in spite of their ferocity,
And downright animosity,
A Yuq will never stab you in the back.
Hots
You should never fall in love with a Yuq,
His embrace can not be easily unstuck,
His smile is quite hateful,
His wink is distasteful,
And his lips produce a most repugnant suck.
Know-all
If you wish to stay in luck,
Never contradict a Yuq,
For he easily despairs,
If you tell him that downstairs,
You’ve the answers to his questions in a book.
Etiquette
In the rarefied world of the Yuqs,
A fork is considered deluxe,
So they eat with their hands,
Wrapped in thick rubber bands.
Remember! They never use hooks.
It Weally Wymes
Wodewick the wascally Yuq,
Couldn’t make a woodchuck chuck.
The solution? Elocution.
Soon the problem had been shook.
Golly
The old-fashioned beings known as Yuqs,
Use archaic expressions like “shucks”,
“just dandy”, “gee whiz”,
“awesome”, words just like these,
And the cockney ones say “luv-a-ducks”.
Rattlebag
Though he never eats breakfast, a Yuq,
When he passes a doorway gets stuck,
He’s as big as a ball,
He’s as wide as he’s tall,
And he rattles inside when he’s shook.
Marooned
It’s a mercy for Swedes that the Yuq,
On the island of Ornö is stuck,
His antlers are rusting,
His smell is disgusting,
On the mainland he’d quite run amok.
Terminus
A visit to Ornö’s outrageous,
To go there is very courageous,
For the beast called the Yuq,
Widely known for its pluck,
Is both fatal and highly contagious.
Incognito
Fly like a bird? Swim like a duck?
Ride a bike? Drive a truck?
A snake? A camel?
A reptile? A mammal?
What’s he like, the elusive Yuq?
Klepto
If you’re missing a Euro, a Kroner, a buck,
You may have lost them to a crook.
They seek him there,
And everywhere,
That damned, elusive, thieving Yuq.
On the Rocks
The Chief Yuq on Ornö said tell’m,
If someone should enter his realm,
Without running aground,
Or turning around.
“I’ll make her the Queen of the Helm”.
Cheese
A Nikon’s the tool to capture a Troll.
Use a Canon if a Witch is your goal.
But the only device,
Which will ever suffice,
For a Yuq, is a box with a hole.
Then my 12 year-old son came up with the following cool idea of distributing the Yuq book by slipping copies into bookshops – the opposite of shop-lifting.
Distribution
If you look for a poem about Yuqs,
Search well in the crannies and nooks.
They’ve been written by hacks,
And slipped into the cracks,
Of all the best sellers of books.
D-Day
Yuqs on Ornö can’t evade,
Flying high makes them afraid,
Boats they hate,
But can they skate?!
When the Baltic freezes over they’ll invade.
Shucks
A walker on Ornö, when struck,
By his narrow escape from a Yuq,
Not being one to swear,
But upset by the scare,
He couldn’t help screaming “Oh … bother”!
Following the first edition, my brother and I sparred in Limerick by text at 3am. Sad but true!
Author, Author!
So now that I’ve learned of the Yuq
And all of the effort it took,
I, too, took some time,
To make up a rhyme,
Is there any more room in your book?
Jet-Lag
Stoned on jet-lag, trans-Atlantic,
Tales from Ornö drove him frantic,
Head in a flux
Distracted by Yuqs
Brother Terry’s gone semantic!
Amnesia
I’m lying here dreaming of Yuqs,
Not getting one’s sleep really sucks,
I know this is boring
‘Cos I should be snoring
And I have to be up with the rooks!
Lullaby
Here’s a lullaby for a Yuq
Or a Yuqlet (if for sleep he’s stuck)
Stop the composing
It’s time for reposing
You really need to get to sleep, Chuck!
Sleepy
To send anew Limerick Or-nö,
Am I feeling high or-low
The Yuqs have it right
When they stay up all night
Is a Yuq a friend or foe?
3:20 am
There’s no Postal Service on Ornö,
The Info Super-Highway died unborn, so
Like it or not,
My battery is shot,
All further correspondence in the morn, ho!
Yuqhunt
Across the Belgian plains they snuck,
South of the Alps they still had no luck,
Now they’ll spend the day,
On a French Motorway,
On the trail of the lonesome Yuq.
The following notion preceeded Benjamin Button by several years.
Back to the Future
Ageing’s most unusual for Yuqs,
It’s subject to a backwards kind of flux,
Born to seniority,
They celebrate minority,
At 18, before starting school and books.
Appreciations “Another masterpiece from Brainchild Books and Surreptitious Distributors, the people who brought you Lullabies for Yuqlets and Speak Yuqish in 30 Days”
Ornö Review of Books 
“The essential guide to getting out of the Stockholm Archipelago without getting your feet wet” Rockhoppers Monthly
